Baby - 13 weeks

Baby: tired

My little one,

Sometimes when I am laying in bed I hold the round ball in my hands and imagine you moving around in there. Soon you'll be big enough to feel your movements but for now it's just a soft bubble and I know you are inside, warm and cozy while it's cold and snowy outside.  I'm tired all the time and some of my other activities don't seem as important anymore, I'd rather be resting and spending quiet time with you.  Please keep growing and trying out your arms and legs, and enjoy the time you have where you are safely with me every moment, this time will pass so quickly that before we know it you will be looking into my eyes as I hold you in my arms.  

With all my heart,

Mommy

Baby: Dreams

Good morning baby,
Thanks to my body turning into an oven while you cook, I've been getting vivid dreams and sometimes waking up in the middle of the night.  Last night I had the room cooler and I slept through the night without waking up but still dreamed a lot.  The first part of the dream was not too good... my mom made me go back to high school and it was humiliating.  I ran away and found my friend Christina and her baby; her little girl smiled at me and everything was better.  You are so tiny now but I can't wait to hold you in my arms and make everything feel right.
I love you as do the rest of your family,
Mommy

Second Snow

I love seeing Derek and Elinor forget whatever they were upset about after looking out the window, their eyes widening and grins lighting up their faces, "it's snowing!" they were bundling up over their pajamas not even remembering breakfast in their eagerness to go experience the cold slippery conditions outside.

Married 35 years

No, not me. I haven't even been around that long. We had a surprise celebration for my parents' 35th anniversary on Friday. It is amazing to witness their faithfulness to each other over the years. Their first kiss was at their wedding. Mom went through 9 pregnancies and together they raised 10 healthy children, now the youngest is 15 and they have 7 grandchildren. We always had food on the table, a roof over our heads, and went to church together every Sunday growing up.

7 of their children and their families and boyfriends were able to come share a meal and celebrate their marriage.

Refocus

Overheard: "I have been improving my vision, year after year, by doing an exercise where I pick different depths and practice changing my focus between the different depths. It's a good exercise for the eye muscle"

Isn't that the case for your life? As I look out at blue skies and sunlit fall colors I have to agree. Our overall vision is driven by what we focus on, near, far, and all points in between. Focus only on one part of the picture and your overall vision gets weaker. Exercise your focus to all areas in your life one by one and I think your overall life vision will surprise you with its ever increasing clarity.

Shalom!

Standing vs bending

Keeping a day of rest. 

Being in the world but not of the world. 

Being a pleaser of God rather than of man. 

Training a child in the way he should go.

As a Christian, these are a handful out of many convictions I have claimed as my own over the years. There are hundreds of excuses I could come up with for temporarily forgetting any one of these, and over time these excuses seem so innocent and reasonable. Although convictions certainly may be understood differently over time, I step back and wonder where they came from.  I find myself struggling more with foundations than ever even as I find myself in the role and with the duty of being a teacher, parent, or leader.  It helps that my husband help me hold to our shared convictions. 

When I start rationalizing and slipping in my faith, where shall I go for my guidance? Is my hope and confidence in myself, or in the Lord?  May I be continually humbled and used as an instrument, may the Lord turn my crumbling clay into a strong vessel. 

In which I study for a week for the CEM

In my field, CEM stands for "Certified Energy Manager". Ok, so it's more letters to put behind your name, but what does it mean?  Last week the family and I travelled down to Tyson's Corner in Vienna, VA just outside of DC to find out what it's all about.

First of all, this is about as rigorous as a graduate level engineering course from a university. I would argue that if a student were to take this course and pass the certification exam they should get college credit for it.

Second, the course expanded my comfort level with understanding building systems.  From envelope heat transfer to motor energy usage to HVAC and controls, from insulation to benchmarking, the course helped fill in the gaps for me. If you want to get down into the specifics, just ask me! (Or take the course yourself)

Third, the testing process itself was a challenge. Answering 130 hard questions  requiring both thought, subject knowledge, and speed with calculations put my capabilities to the test (literally) under pressure. With 4 hours to complete the exam, it is a wonder I came up with an answer to every question. Testing strategy was critical to make sure I answered as many questions with the highest probability of each being correct as possible. 

After going through this past week, I agree that this certification means I have a good grasp of the theory and application of the science behind energy usage and the opportunities for conservation and efficiency to reduce building operation costs. I am better equipped to do my job and help other people do their jobs! Now I wait for the next few weeks to find out whether I passed or not. Thank you to those of you who prayed and thought of me during this time. 

Thank you also to all who extended hospitality to us during our time in the area.Janice and Glen gave us a place to recover from the long drive down, and we had fun getting to know them (Janice is a really smart nerd/friend of mine from Roberts). Dara carved time out of her crazy schedule to socialize with us, so refreshing to see her smile and laugh with her. Now that Tripp isn't the baby anymore Derek and Elinor had a blast playing trains with him, and it was a special treat to hold strong little Sander for the first time. Mike got to exchange nerdy witticisms and play chess with his cousin Lauren and her husband while all our kids went wild. It was certainly wonderful to see Ralph and Lisa and see how much Kylie and Christian have grown - it is hard to believe how long it has been since we have seen them! Ralph even let is be taste testers for a new creme brûlée cheesecake he is experimenting with... What a treat! And Katie got to spend the week with my sisters and parents away from little kids, so she got a mini vacation herself!

What a blessing this past week has been. 

Be green and I will understand if you don't leave the lights on for me!

Meet Elinor

Elinor Claire - bright shining light. Happy little girl is she!

What can I say but that my redhead has spirit - very independent, she is never far behind her brother. She insists on doing every thing "me own" as she likes to say. She easily climbs the ladder up to her top bunk with no help. As I write, Elinor is "reading" a book in her bed. Usually we come back several minutes later and find her sprawled with a book open across her sleeping figure. 

Elinor enjoys playing "mommy" with her stuffed animals and coloring. She also likes to pick out her own clothes, especially brightly colored ones. 

I leave you with a picture from her nap taken when I got home from work. 

What's a Bridie?

Aside from the new wife of a hubby, a bridie is a traditional Scottish pastry with a savory meat filling... Mmm!

I took the two little ones to downtown Hartford for the Pipes in the Valley Festival! Here we are eating our bridies while watching the Games. We watched the caper toss. Both men and women took three tries to hoist a tree pole in the air and see who could get it to land the farthest away. It was exciting and almost comical as they wobbled trying to balance the pole and control its momentum, some tries more successful than others. Not an easy task, makes you appreciate the job of ants more!

After the caper toss was over, the kids rushed over to the bouncy castle giraffe for kicks and giggles and bounced around for a while. Derek took sword fighting 101 before we left. 

Meet Derek

Boy, is this boy fun! Derek's first question this morning was "mommy, will you play with me?" Instead we ate breakfast and learned from "the letter people" as I got ready for work.

Derek just started kindergarten at home and he is like a sponge, and enjoying every minute of it! I don't recall anything from my own kindergarten days except the songs my teacher used to play during class. Derek loves music - homeschooling is working great since he is actually learning much of his lessons through music right now. I always struggled with history myself, I found it tedious.  Derek is going through the Classical Conversations "timeline" song and cards every day - I am so impressed with his progress in memorization and his enthusiasm!

Outside of his schoolwork, Derek loves playing with Legos or board games or running around or biking or playing with his friends that live next door. He is constantly humming music - anything from Star Wars one moment to Mario brothers or something he made up on the spot. 

Derek's whole name means "cheerful leader, protector". Yes, he is frequently happy, bossy, and so protective (not always all at once)... living up to his name. Although he constantly tries my patience, I love this kid!

My family - meet Katie

Meet my family. My father in law came to visit a couple weeks ago and we took this at our church picnic.

Today, I introduce Katie. Katie is my stepdaughter. If it weren't for her I may not have ever gotten involved with this lot. That's a whole other story. Katie moved in with us this year after graduating. When asked what she is doing lately, she often answers "nothing" (she is still job hunting) but that's far from the truth. I depend on her for a lot to keep the household running since I work all day. She loves her little brother and sister and takes on child care responsibilities when Mike and I both have commitments. She washes dishes and does laundry. All with little to no complaining and cheerfully while plugged into her iPod. Bringing her into our everyday lives has been overwhelmingly positive.  We are happy she decided to make our home her new home too!

Trombone

I struggled to reach beyond a middle D tonight. I am still glad to have made it to rehearsal though. I started learning the trombone this spring in order to fill in for the Dick Santi Orchestra and the Al Fenton Big Band. I feel like I belong, I love feeling needed! Some nights, like tonight, my body doesn't cooperate to produce the sounds I am looking for, but like true comrades, I might as well have been hitting every note - the attitude is that we are all in this together to improve ourselves and each other and have a lot of fun in the process! 

The cherry on top was actually getting paid for some of the summer gigs!  Time to go pro! Well, maybe not until I can hit the high D with ease!

Glissandos all around!!

Welcome!

This blog, Always Brilli!, is written by me for you.

What's with the name?

Brilli! to me means "Shining Brightly".  You also might say it's a synonym for my married last name, "Gay".  Or short for the word "Brilliant".  Either way, I hope the words I write make your eyes shine and enrich your mind.  I hope to build you up and encourage you.  

I think the Newsboys lyrics are appropriate here:

"Shine / Make 'em wonder what you've got

Make 'em wish that they were not

On the outside looking bored"

I love to get comments; keep in mind that positivity is contagious and very much appreciated!

Until next time,

Shine!